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Communicating effectively in every day scenarios

What is the power of the spoken or the written word? Churchill said, “We are masters of the unsaid word, but slaves of those we let slip out” and Jean-Paul Sarte claimed “Words are loaded pistols.”

All of us have, at some point in our personal or professional lives, been confronted with situations where we have either averted a major “disaster” or fallen headfirst into one because of what we said. And when we look back on what transpired, very often we realize, it isn’t “what” we said, but “how” we said something that produced that desirable (or disastrous) outcome.
There is no getting away from it, or getting around it – communicating effectively is something we all need to do, in all walks of life, day in and day out.

The video below is a wonderful example of how your choice of words can influence people or situations differently.

Of the five Leadership Intelligences (Analytical, Communicative, Inventive, Operational and Ethical), it is evident that it is the Communicative Leadership Intelligence that comes into play here. In the video, the lady (in black) exercises this LI to change the way the visually challenged gentleman is perceived by people around (it can also be argued that she does this by appealing to the crowd’s Ethical Leadership Intelligence) thereby considerably increasing the donations made to him.

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Gratitude and leadership

A TEDxSF talk by Louie Schwartzberg titled Nature. Beauty. Gratitude offers much to think about for all of us in how we can and should lead. Humility is perhaps the most important characteristic of leadership. And at the heart of humility is gratitude. Intelligence makes us aware; awareness makes us recognize all there is to be thankful for and thus generates gratitude; and gratitude makes us humble.

Enjoy the video:

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How to measure a leader’s capacity to adapt

The leadership guru Warren Bennis says that the key competence of a leader is “adaptive capacity”–the ability to deal with change. Adaptability is also at the core of innovation. Vivekin’s Leadership Intelligences Framework (LIF) is centrally concerned with measuring and developing a person’s ability to adapt. It does this comprehensively using 5 different intelligences: analytical, operational, inventive, communicative, and most importantly, ethical intelligence. Vivekin’s LIF is comprehensive in another way too: it measures both one’s aptitude to adapt and one’s ability to adapt.
We’re trying to benchmark LIF against other measures of adaptability. One such metric is Lumina Learning Inc.’s Spark–which uses a Jungian approach . Do you know of any other framework or system that measures the adaptive capacity of an individual? Do you use any such system in your organization?

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Enhance your Leadership Intelligences Through Exercise (ELITE): Communicative Intelligence Exercise 110901

Introduction
Leadership intelligences are like muscles. The more you exercise them, the stronger they become.
Vivekin’s ELITE (Enhance your Leadership Intelligences Through Exercise) program provides exercises
drawn from daily life that are structured to help you develop each of the five leadership intelligences.

Watch every Monday morning for a leadership intelligence exercise that Vivekin Group selects from
its ELITE program and provides free of cost to its subscribers.
Want to get such exercises regularly? Make sure you sign up for Vivekin’s RSS feed.

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The Exercise
This week’s exercise helps you work on your communicative leadership intelligence.
It involves reading a joke and then providing a response to the question that follows.

The Joke
Three men are on death row–an Italian, an American, and an Indian–and are to be executed on the same day. On the scheduled day, the prison warden comes to them and asks the Italian, “What would you like for your last meal?” The Italian says “Nothing better than a big bowl of spaghetti with meat balls rolling in rich marinara sauce!” And then turning to his friends he remarks in a sad voice, “Reminds me of my mother.” The dish is procured quickly, the Italian relishes it, and is executed. The warden then asks the American what he would like to eat. The American sighs and says, “Oh! I’d love to have a steak real rare, and a few slices of fresh risen bread.” It takes some time to cook this meal because they have to wait for the bread to rise. But after a few hours, the meal is brought to the American. He relishes it, and is executed. Now the warden turns to the Indian and says, “Brownie! What would you like to eat?” The Indian exclaims, “Oh! What would I give for a bowlful of fresh mangoes from the plains of south India!” The warden exclaims, “What? Mangoes! They’re out of season and will take at least a year to get here!” The Indian replies, “No problem! I’ll wait.”

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As with most jokes, there are several versions of this joke. One version appears in
Thomas Cathcart and Daniel Klein’s, Heidegger and a Hippo Walk Through the Pearly Gates

The Task
You now have three minutes to respond to the following question:
If you were fourth in line to be executed, what would you request for your last meal?

Provide your response through the comments box below this post. Comments will be made public late in the evening on Tuesday.

Benefits
The exercise will help enhance your communicative intelligence by doing three things.

  • It will exercise your capacity for wit
  • It will enhance your ability to understand the pattern of previous responses in the joke and
  • It will exercise your intelligence in building on that pattern to provide a better response
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A Funny Thing Happened In The CEO’s Office: Meg Whitman at HP

From my “A Funny Thing Happened In The CEO’s Office” Collection
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“I have run a large company — not obviously as large as HP, but I have run a very large company,” she said. “While I don’t have years of experience in an enterprise business, I bought a lot of software. I was one of the largest enterprise customers in Silicon Valley.”
—Meg Whitman, Former CEO E-Bay, Incoming CEO of HP

“That’s like saying, ‘I’ve bought an iPhone, so I can run Apple Inc.’”
—Chris Whitmore, an analyst at Deutsche Bank AG.
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Quotes From a Bloomberg BusinessWeek article

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The danger of being purely strategic….

Or Why We Need Operational Leadership Intelligence

From a book my 12-year old daughter was reading: Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days by Jeff Kinney

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Micro-Leadership Before Macro

The buzz about Anna Hazare is still ringing in our ears here in monsoon-soaked Hyderabad, even after he has settled back in his village in Maharashtra. Throughout his Delhi fast—which ironically provided prime fodder for primetime TV—we saw people wearing caps that said “I am Anna.” Many friends on Facebook have a badge that says “I am Anna.”

Really? Am I Anna? Are you Anna? What does it take to be “Anna”? What does it take to be a leader?

If you want to be a leader, please emblazon this on your soul: “The first person I should lead is myself.” There is no new truth in this. Great leaders and wise men have always demonstrated it. Let me use an Indian example since the setting is Indian. About a year ago, my taxi driver in Hyderabad told me the following story about Gandhi. A woman approached Gandhi at a public meeting, and requested him to tell her grandson to not eat sugar. “Coming from you, that request will be definitely heeded by my grandson,” she said. Gandhi pondered for a moment and asked her to come back after a few weeks bringing the boy again. She came back—as asked—a few weeks later with the boy. And this time, Gandhi called the boy close and said, “Don’t eat sugar.” The boy nodded vigorously and the woman and her grandson went away. An associate asked Gandhi, “But Gandhiji, you could have told him the same thing some weeks ago. Why did you make her come back?” Gandhi replied, “I had to stop eating sugar before I could ask him to do so.”

Stories such as these permeate the fabric of Indian society. And yet, we do not make them our own. We let them float in and out of social consciousness, making no attempt to ground the stories in ourselves.

So, to come back, what do we mean when we say, “I am Anna”? It is very easy to say “That official is corrupt,” or “This politician is even more corrupt.” Have we noticed how corrupt we are? What do we do to get things moving in a government office? Are we willing to say, “Even if my file does not move, I will not pay a bribe?” Let us begin the anti-corruption campaign there. Let us first remove the corruption within ourselves.

And a closing thought: The corruption that involves money is bad, but the corruption that concerns the soul is worse. Are we handling either in our personal lives? True leadership should be rooted in the micro for it to rise to the macro.

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India-Pakistan Cricket Match: A Leadership Lesson

In India, the tension is very tangible and the air has a prickly feeling to it on the day of the India-Pakistan 2011 World Cup semi-final cricket match. The match has been called many things from the worn-out cliché “mother of all battles” to Sir Viv Richards’ expression “war without weapons.” The analogy of war is not even sub-cutaneous leave alone subliminal. But in some ways this is worse than war—there can be uneasy truces that can stop a war and long spells of cold tension that threaten but never erupt. In this semifinal match, there is no such comfort—one team has to win and the other has to lose. This is the knockout stage. In a game like cricket, there in never a guarantee of who will win and who will lose. What is guaranteed is that one team stays and the other goes.This brings me to the issue of leadership. First, though, a story of two great kings from almost two thousand years ago. Many of us heard it as a folktale when we were growing up in India, but it has been recently recounted by Guy Maclean Rogers in Alexander: The Ambiguity of Greatness (New York: Random House, 2004). The story is told that when Alexander of Greece invaded India in 326 BCE, he came up against the mighty army of the Indian king, Puru. On the banks of the Jhelum, a fierce battle took place—Greek historians later called it the Battle of Hydaspes, the Greek name for Jhelum. Alexander’s fast and fierce cavalry were pitted against Puru’s mighty elephant brigades. Alexander won the bloody battle, suffering considerable losses himself, and the vanquished Puru was brought to him. It is said that Alexander asked Puru how he would like to be treated, and the defeated King Puru, standing tall, replied, “Like a king.” Impressed by Puru’s leadership and courage even in defeat, Alexander made him an ally, returned his kingdom to him, and even gave him with some additional regions to rule.All too often, we measure leadership by the yardstick of success. Yes, success is important, but it is in the face of loss, that the quality of leadership is most demonstrated. Great leaders show courage, valor, and grit during a battle, but whether they win or lose, they demonstrate dignity and honor. Above all, however, when the battle is over, whether they have won or lost, great leaders have the humility to deeply acknowledge that all of humankind is fragile and that we always live in the shadow of this knowledge. The captains of the two teams—but more importantly, the people of both Pakistan and India—should remember this lesson of leadership after their semi-final match in the 2011 Cricket World Cup. They should play, and win or lose with dignity and honor and act with the knowledge that the result of the match only proves that cricket—like life—is an uncertain game.Baba Prasad

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How Leadership Begins in the Family

Often, leadership development seems to begin and end in the corporate environment. How do we take the lessons learned during corporate training to environments beyond the company, and on the other hand how do we bring leadership lessons from the outside world into the company? Excellent leadership training will actually make the environments inside and outside the work-place seamless. The focus of good leadership development should be to make leadership an everyday habit.In this context, the key thing to recognize is that our families are both sources of leadership lessons, and also sites in which to practice leadership. For a child, a parent is a role model and leadership qualities displayed by the parent become lessons for the child. Remember Harper Lee’s characterization of Atticus Finch in To Kill a Mocking Bird?

As parents we are leaders to our children, and the family becomes a laboratory in which we try to teach leadership and learn from the feedback. Listen to this 5-minute extract from Sidney Poitier’s speech at Guilford College, NC in 2003. It is a superb illustration of how our leadership abilities develop within the family and why we need to show leadership qualities in the family. The scene begins with Poitier as a 15-year old kid having been arrested for stealing and roasting corn in a cornfield. Listen:
[audio:http://vivekingroup.com/audio/SidneyPoitier_Leadership.mp3|bg=0x0000ff|righticon=0xff0000] Sidney Poitier on Leadership Lessons in the Family
The full speech can be found here

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Leadership requires a child-like questioning ability

We often forget to ask fundamental questions, especially, “Why?” and “Why not?” Children have that ability to ask the most searching, “Why?” and “Why not?” questions, and all without an element of prejudice. We seem to lose it as we grow up–society (which includes ourselves) teaches us to stop asking such questions. Instead, we make assumptions, we develop stereotypes, and when it comes to using our analytical leadership intelligence, since we think we already know, we neglect to ask the fundamental questions.Here’s an exercise:I was reading a book with my six-year old daughter. The book’s called Fire on Toytown Hill and is written by Jenny Giles. A fire truck finds it cannot put out the fire on a hillside and radios a helicopter for assistance. The helicopter arrives and puts out the fire with a barrel of water.Here are two pictures from that book–the first one shows the helicopter arriving and the second one shows it pouring the water. Before I tell you the question my daughter asked, I’d like you to look at the two pictures and think of some fundamental “Why?” or “How? questions.

Toytown Hill on Fire
Toytown Hill fire being put out
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